Review – The f**king Moshi Monsters Bus (Shop)

On Friday and Saturday just gone, the ‘Moshi Monsters Bus‘ rolled into Chelmsford. The vinyl covered double decker looks fabulous, even more exciting, it had a slide from the top deck! G had wanted to come and see the Bus for weeks, and today, as she’d been good, we thought she could go and see it. When we went past at 9.30am, there was a little queue forming (it was due to open at 11am), we got there at 10.45 and joined the queue. It wasn’t *that* much of a queue really, but a guy from the crew came out and told us it should be ‘up to an hour wait’, I groaned but found solace in the ‘up to’ bit.. It might not be an hour….

We queued, and queued – amazingly G didn’t moan, she just stood there, excited at what was to come, after 45 minutes we made it here..

ANOTHER 30 MINUTES? Jeez.. Buster Bumblefuckinchops could kiss my arse! I was hoping the original estimation of ‘up to an hour’ might still be accurate..

It wasn’t.

Another 45 minutes later, we were at the door of the Moshi Monsters Bus!

Hooooray! What wonder and awe awaited us?

Well.. Sod all to be honest – Buster Bumblefuckinchops was on the lower deck, waiting to sell you a photo of your child and him for £4.99, I took one, it’s a bit bit blurry, the passive aggressive rage made my hand shake.

We were then ushered onto the top deck, there MUST be something up there to make the wait for the f**king Moshi Monsters Bus bearable.

There wasn’t.

It was a shop, that’s it, a shop lined with Moshi Monsters tut. There were a few Nintendo DS’s at the top of the stairs with a Moshi game on it, but really, the last thing I wanted to do after an hour and a half was watch G play on a DS. We shuffled down the shop, G picked up a few things she could spend her pocket money on, G got a special ‘collectors card’ with a bus on, and with that – our hour and a half wait to go on a fucking shopping trip in a bus was over.

G slide down the slide, I wanted to find the nearest bar and slip down the slide to drunkenness. If your child ever asks to go on the Moshi Monsters Bus, just take them to the Moshi section of a toy shop. It will save you time, if not money.