Whilst sifting through my old photos, I realised a lot of my recent life is documented online – but none of the early part. So I thought I’d give you a brief story of me – illustrated with photos. From the point I was born, to the day this blog started. I can’t really tell you the whole story, but – here’s the abridged Story of Me.

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So yeah – that’s me, hours in to life, standard slightly ugly baby shot.

Here are a few of me and my sister – there’s 18 months between us, she, like most of the women in the family is pretty tiny, and we were often mistaken for twins.

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I adored my sister and had to do everything she did when we were little, it explains my short lived stint in ballet classes! My sister is awesome, we’re still close! She’s done the university thing, and worked hard to get a great job, I’m really proud of my dwarf like sibling!

These are my parents, they aren’t together any more – but they look roughly the same even now (well perhaps with less hair on Dad) and better taste in clothes.. (Ish!) 😉

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I’m blessed with wonderful parents, who despite my various fuck ups along the way, have really looked after me. If I’m half the parent they are, to my children, I know I’ll have done well.

I’ve only one surviving Grandparent, my Mum’s Mum (Bottom Right), G never got to meet my Dad’s Parent’s (Bottom Left and Top Right) and my Great Great Grandma (holding me!), thankfully she got to meet my Grandad (Top Left). They are / were incredible people, all hardworking folk, I’m gutted G+J never got to meet them all, they made my childhood fabulous.

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My only other really close family are my cousins, they are a few years younger than me, but my Mum looked after them as they grew up. I don’t see them all that much these days, but it was fabulous to have such close relatives!

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As a child, most of my closest friends were female, there just weren’t any boys my age on my road – just one in fact. It’s probably no surprise I was picked and called ‘Gay’ at school, I just got on better with girls, and to be honest, I still do! We used to have so much fun when we were little, and still keep in touch over Facebook.

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Random fact about me.. I used to be obsessed with collecting gnomes, a gnome was the very first thing I bought with my pocket money, this was a my collection.1000026

I didn’t do Scouts or Beavers when I was younger – I did the St Johns Ambulance variant – BADGERS !! I completed all the sections, and actually became a SUPER BADGER (I shit ye not!). This is me picking up my Super Badger (I’ve still got the porcelain bastard upstairs!!)

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I’ve not got too many pictures of my teenage years, I was essentially the same as I am now, a bespeckled awkward idiot. Although I tried to avoid wearing my glasses as much as possible – I hated them. Here’s a handful (feel free to laugh!)

I don’t have many photos of my later teen years, so we’ll skip forwards a little to another random fact about me.. I used to collect arcade machines! I had 15 of them squeezed into the tiny bungalow that became my first place to live when I left home, it was a shit hole, but it was our shithole, filled with my lovely machines.

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Let’s skip forward a few years, a few houses, and stone later, to.. becoming a dad to G..

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My tiny little princess really changed my life, I didn’t really feel like an adult, even then, I felt like a kid looking after a baby. I’d never changed a nappy, or given a baby a bath before, and here I was, with one to do all that stuff with, it was terrifying, but you sort of get the hang of it. Ish.

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I hate this photo of me, I really do, but it’s important, I never wanted to look this way again, and mostly.. I haven’t. Let’s jump forward a bit..

This is my best friend, he’s a fucking idiot, but I love him to bits, we’ve know each other for years, and he’s always been a pillar of support (literally!). He’s not long become a Dad himself, so, inevitably, I don’t see him as much as I use to.. But this was us in 2004..

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And us not so long ago.. I think we’ve improved with age.

Anyway.. Let’s get back to the timeline…

This was G’s first ever experience of a Theme Park – Alton Towers, riding a chicken (as you do) on the Doodle Doo Derby! I’m a MASSSSSSIVE theme park geek, I could bore you senseless with facts, figures and trivia of the UK’s Theme Parks. G seemed to enjoy her first ride!

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The next few years or so are a rather depressing blur, I’ll spare you the gorey details for now, but come September 2007, I was a bit of a train wreck. I wasn’t eating, or sleeping, I was broken (the faux smile says it all!)..

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I was so painfully close to the edge at this time, I honestly think, if I didn’t have G, I wouldn’t be here today. I’d isolated myself from my friends, I hadn’t seen my best friend for well over a year, I needed to sort my shit out, and get back on it.. So I got back in touch with Chris, met him for a drink.. And. Well the next year or so was a bit of a drunken blur..

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Spending the last half of 2007 and first half of 2008 getting pissed a lot perhaps wasn’t the BEST idea. But it worked. Instead of sitting at home dwelling and hating myself, I went out, and met new people, made new friends and starting to feel a bit more normal. Not long after, I decided to start the blog, and well – 5 years on, I’m here..

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Still a big idiot, but, a happy, calm and content big idiot.

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